Selflessness

The more one meditates and the more one is more mindful in daily life, the greater the sense of “connectedness” to all other things. The experience of self becomes inclusive of all things rather then exclusive. What is self anyway? Ponder that question; it is a good analytical contemplation.

A useful way of developing the sense of selflessness further is to consider whom you love and respect, and gradually widen the net. Probably you love yourself. If you think you do not, contemplate that notion and you should find that what you really mean is you dislike certain traits about yourself. at heart you want to change those traits. Why? Because you love yourself; if not, why would you brother wanting to change?

Next, consider who else you love and respect. Probably they will be your parents or children and other close friends. You dislike your parents? No! it just hurts to know that you do not get on with them, or they have favored someone else rather than you. If you did not love them, their indifference to you would brother you so much.

When you look closely, you will see that you categorize people into three groups: those you love and/or respect (in varying degrees), those you dislike and/or do not respect (in varying degrees), and those to whom you are completely indifference. In a way, people in the latter group are the ones who exacerbate your isolation, because at least you have some connection with and acknowledgement of the people in the other groups, whether in a positive or negative way.

Actually, another other contemplation exercise is to consider why you dislike certain people. Most people find that they dislike certain people mainly because they have the same irritating traits they see within themselves. In other words, they cannot bear to be reminded of themselves. Once again, the long-term solution is acceptance. Once accepted, things usually seem to improve. Try it and see.

So, widen your net to include those people you quite like. Add in those you dislike and reflect on the certainty that they are somebody’s son or daughter .
They could just a easily have been your son or daughter if time and space had worked out differently. Lastly, include all those to whom you are indifferent. That is more difficult, because you do not have such a strong point of reference about them on which to latch your mind. This is a classic technique and it works well. It gets easier the more you do it. You could call it a love and compassion meditation.

Now you know another kind of meditation love and compassion. As I’ve written formerly, you should know the other two meditation, analytical meditataion and stabilizing meditation.

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